Chase and Dawn

Something Closer to my heart

2011-10-24T02:49:00.002-06:00

It has been over a year since I have posted anything to this blog for many reasons. Each time I sat down to put anything on here it was usually negative and depressing and or sad and I didn't want the tone of my blog to be that way so it was just blank. But I am going to turn over a new leaf and try something out of my comfort zone. As most of my family know, I write poetry to express my emotions and cope with my feelings and I guess I just like to as well. I will admit I have not the range of skills my sister Denise posseses, but I am going to post a poem I wrote the other night while I was up and couldn't sleep (aka the story of my life). Here goes:

Green Eyes

A girl with wavy curls

of black hair down her back

and emerald green eyes

boring deep into my soul-

haunts me

each night

I am sleepwalking I say

please wake me up

from this unending

task of determening

reality

and a fantasy world.

She has creamy white skin

and a splash of freckles over her nose.

I can't help but wonder if she is from

my past--some relative I have met

in a time before-

or is she someone I will meet

in the future-

someone who is part me

part him.

Is this just silly thoughts that come

to me late at night to comfort me

when I am oh so lonely_

whomever she is-

for now, she is mine.

She turns and looks at me

just as the sun is rising at her back-

-and she smiles

And in that smile I see

Love

-Dawn Cooper Volkman

Dad Volkman

2010-09-13T19:36:00.002-06:00

My father-in-law passed away suddenly over the weekend. We are in deep sorrow. Please keep the Volkman family in your prayers. Thank you to those who have already expressed their love and concern for the family. We love you Dad and will miss you more than words can express.

A Giveaway you should check out...

2010-05-12T04:08:00.003-06:00

Jaime from The Dress Up Drawer is giving away a Seventh Generation Healthy Home Starter Kit and thought y'all should know about it. She also makes and sells these adorable LDS Super Capes for little kids. So Cute. Her blog is http://thedressupdrawer.blogspot.com . The Giveaway goes until May 17th and will be announced May 19.

What's cooking tonight

2010-05-03T18:51:00.003-06:00

I just got done enjoying our dinner tonight and thought I'd post this recipe. It is really easy and simple, and one of my very favorite meals to make/eat/enjoy.

Cheese Manicotti Shells

1 pkg. manicotti shells
1 15 oz. ricotta cheese
2 cups shredded mozzarella cheese
1/2 cup grated parmesean cheese
1 egg
1 Tbsp. chopped fresh parsley
1/4 tsp. salt
1/4 tsp. pepper
1/8 tsp. nutmeg
2 cups spaghetti sauce

Prepare pasta as directed; drain. Rinse with cold water, drain and arrange in single layer to fill. Meanwhile, mix ricotta cheese, 1 to 1 1/2 cups of the mozzarella cheese, 1/4 cup parmesean cheese, the egg, parsley, salt and pepper and nutmeg. Spoon mixture into manicotti shells using at least 1/3 cup per shell. Place filled manicotti shells in a single layer in a greased 13x9 inch baking pan. Pour spaghetti sauce over manicotti shells. Sprinkle with remaining 1/2-1 cup mozzarella cheese and 1/4 cup parmesean.

Bake at 350 for 35 minutes. Serves 4-6

P.S. Variation: I used to have a boyfriend from high school who made these filled with chicken tenders. Those are also good.

Enjoy!

Our Easter Vacation

2010-04-07T20:35:00.003-06:00

This year for Easter we went to Gothenburg, Nebraska with Chase's family to visit his Grandma Volkman and Aunts and Uncles and cousins and other relatives. I've been back to Nebraska two times before so I knew what a long trip driving was going to be. The family seems to be cursed when driving back there. The weather has been awful every time we go there. Sure enough this year we had some awful snow storms. We left at 5:00 am Thursday and planned on getting there in about 12 hours later. We basically had bad weather once we got into Ogden canyon on I-80 and continued until Laramie Wyoming. I have been having some fun health problems (kidney stones, ulcers) so we were about out of Laramie when I mentioned to Ken (my dad in law) that I needed to stop and get my stomach medication out of the trunk because I was having some major pain and nausea. Ken asked if I could wait another 1/2 hour and I said sure. About two minutes later there was an off ramp and he suddenly said, "I think we should get off here and we can stop and get your meds". So we got on the off ramp. We saw on the freeway up ahead all of these cars stopped. We pulled into a Walmart and checked the radio for weather updates. It said that I-80 was closed from Laramie to Cheyene. My dad must have been inspired because we would have been stopped on the freeway with no place to get off.

So we waited. And waited. And waited. For about 3 hours. Still not open. Finally Ken and Bev decided we'd just have to get a hotel because the Walmart employees said that sometimes the road stays closed overnight. I was so glad they made that decision. I was going crazy sitting in the car, I finally had Chase and I go inside the Walmart to wait because I was clausterphobic in the car. Chase's request was a pool because we happened to bring our swimming suits. We found a nice Best Western and got two rooms for Ken and Bev, Trevor and Leilani, Zach and Chase and I. Zach stayed with Chase and I and Trev and Lei stayed with the 'rents. We settled in and went to dinner at Godfather's Pizza (ok but not the best) and then came back and got in the pool and hot tub. I swam some laps to work off the pizza then got a stomachache (awesome) and then got into the hot tub. Trev and Zach got in the hot tub with us as well and we relaxed after a stressful day. The Best Western had a nice continental breakfast the next morning and we left at about six the next morning.

Thankfully the road was open and we got into North Platte at around Noon to meet with Aunt Darla at the mall. Us girls went shopping. The boys continued on to Gothenburg. We had a good time. Eventhough Lei is my sis-in-law, we had never been shopping together. I really enjoyed it. She had a really good honest opinion on the clothes I tried on. The mall was smaller than the Logan one but it did have a Maurices, Vanity, Claires, B&B Works and Buckle (my not so fav store). Then we went and ate at Applebee's. So good. We then headed to Gothenburg.

We all stayed at Aunt Darla's house. That night we played some games-and went to bed. The next day the whole family met at Grandma Volkman's assisted living home and had lunch. We had a good time visiting and then they kicked us out at 2 pm because they were having bingo for the old folks. Geez, can't they wait? We retired back to Aunt Darla's house and later Chase's Uncle Dave and his family went to their Catholic Easter services, we played more games. Chase and I took a nice long nap during the day as well. I wasn't feeling all that great that day.

Easter morning we awoke to Aunt Darla and Uncle LaMont gone to their church services so we got ready and got online to listen to our LDS General Conference. There were some really nice talks. When they got back, we left for cousin Keri's house for Easter Lunch. I was feeling so nauseated and sick, I hardly ate anything but it looked very good. The weather was so sunny and hot. Chase, Trev and Lei all ended up getting sunburned. I knew my complexion. I didn't have sunscreen but I kept in the shade and only ended up with my scalp burned a little bit.

After the food had settled, we went across the street to the park for an Easter egg hunt. There were only two kids and the rest were adults. Aunt Darla had one $50 egg and 2 $20 eggs. I sure wanted one of those but didn't get one. Trev got one $20 egg ( the lucky kid) and I ended up with blisters on my heels from wearing my new flats and running in them.

I was still not feeling good so Ken and Bev and Darla and LaMont went on a motorcyle ride that evening while Zach, Trevor and Leilani and cousin Keri and Corry went to see Clash of the Titans. Chase and I and Lexi(Trevor and Lei's dog had to come along with us) stayed at Darla's house and rented The Blind Side (such a good movie). The next morning we got up and left at 5:30 am.

Sure enough- bad weather again. No road closures though. We got back at 5 pm and we were so tired. I am still recovering. I missed my family but it was nice to see our relatives in Nebraska. It was good to see Grandma, she is so sweet. I miss seeing all of our relatives.

Hope everyone had a Happy Easter! Sorry for the long post.

Happy 3 years for us!

2010-03-07T12:51:00.004-07:00

Isn't he just adorable?
I know its a couple days early but just wanted to post about our 3 year anniversary. I have the best husband ever and I am so happy he picked me. Thank you honey. I love you and thank you for making me smile for our 5 years together. I hope we have many many more years to come of laughter and fun. Decided to post early because we will be gone on our actual anniversary up to Lava Hot Springs and Pocatello Idaho for a couple of days. I can't wait to just get away for a little bit.

There were some great memories from that day and some not so great things- mostly great though. At our reception our waterfall behind us broke and started shooting water everywhere- yep that was fun. I actually was pretty calm about it. That was the worst thing that happened that day thank goodness.

We had the most amazing day and I am so thankful to all of our families and friends who made our day special. It truly was so wonderful. I am truly blessed to have Chase and great family.

Check it out...

2010-02-26T21:13:00.002-07:00

Hey my friend Shelayna is doing a Rachel Ray Stoneware Giveaway over on her website. You should definitely check it out. This set is so adorable. The website is http://shelblogs.blogspot.com

Go there if you please!

Thank you!

Have a fabulous day!

The Winner Is...

2010-02-23T14:59:00.003-07:00

Ok I was down in SLC helping my sister and haven't been able to draw for the drawing yet. I am sorry that this is a day late.

I ended up with 56 entries. I went on over to random.org and the winning number is

#46 which is Spamgirl said...
tweeted AND facebooked entry #3 :)

Congratulations Spamgirl! You have until Wednesday February 24 to contact me, I will also try to email you since you left your email address.

Thank you to everyone who entered. I promise to do another drawing soon.

Have a Wonderful Day!

Hello Fellow Bloggers...My First Giveaway

2010-02-15T06:30:00.012-07:00

First of all I would like to welcome my fellow swap-bot partners from the best swapping website ever. If you don't know about this website, you should seriously check it out. It is a website about a group of people that swap anything and everything from postcards to brighten your day to crafts to small packages to pen pal snail mail swaps. It is a lot of fun and I enjoy it immensely. The website is http://www.swap-bot.com.

I hope everyone enjoyed Valentine's Day. My husband was so sweet to me although he claims that this holiday is just made up to spend money and for stores to make money. Which may be true, but who can argue with a day just about Love, right? My husband got me something sparkly. And that was totally a suprise. Oh what a sweet husband I have.

For those that are visiting me here for the first time I will tell a little about myself. I am in my early 20s and have been married for 3 years in March. What a wonderful day. Here is a pic of me and my hubby on that day:

I enjoy crafts like sewing, embroidery, scrapbooking, painting, and sketching. I also love to read. That is my number 1 hobby. You will usually find me ignoring home chores to read instead. My husband will be watching TV and I will be reading next to him on the couch. One of my favorite series is the Outlander series by Diana Gabaldon. She is such an amazing author and this series is excellent. I also have enjoyed Juliet Marillier's Sevenwaters Trilogy. She is also a very good author. I also like to write poetry. I don't know if I'm any good. But that is also a hobby of mine. I like to blog (obviously). I love the outdoors. I love to hike and hunt with my family and husband. My sister and mom wonder why in the world I hunt but I do enjoy it. I like to play and watch sports like basketball, baseball/softball and volleyball. I ran track in high school and that was fun. I wasn't the best at it but I still enjoyed pushing myself and getting a great workout. If you know me you will also know I love Pepsi. It is my guilty pleasure. So bad. Oh well. Maybe one day soon I can quit you. My hubby and I also like to watch movies together. He will even sometimes watch chick flicks with me. How awesome is that. And yes, he did go and see Twilight and New Moon with me and didn't sleep through it.

I work part time in retail at a totally awesome store. I like it and I like the people I work with. I am not currently attending school right now but I want to go back and finish soon. Right now I am thinking about majoring in English since I enjoy reading and writing. Or maybe something in the Healthcare field. I don't know. We have one cat named Tinkerbell. She is a little devil of a cat. She is also very fat. No kids yet but we are hoping soon :) -someday in the next year or two we can have them.

**This past weekend we also got to celebrate at my Dad's Retirement party. He is truly an amazing father and has accomplished much in his life. He has worked very hard to provide for his family and he is also one of the most inspiring people I've met. He has done so much with running and cycling that most people would just be amazed at how well in shape he is at his age now. He has been running and cycling for around 30 years now. I have fond memories of he and I together fishing or him teaching me how to drive (what patience) as well as his jokes he always makes that you aren't expecting. Here is a picture of my hubby, me and my Dad at my husband's birthday a couple years ago. Dad I am so proud of you and all of your accomplishments. I love you!

Now to the Giveaway!

I thought to celebrate getting possibly 10 new blog friends from Swap-bot (and more), I should give something away. Hmmm...what to give away? Oh yeah. How about some Mary Kay? Since this is my first giveaway I am hoping to get some new people to check out my blog. This giveaway is open to anyone 18 or older around the world so you are eligible if you live on Earth. Woo-hoo!

It is the Mary Kay Winterberry Gift Set. This set includes a 2 oz. body mist, 3 oz. body wash, and 2 oz body butter. This fragrance smells so yummy. And it comes in a cute mesh zip bag. It retails at $26!

Now here is how you can win this:

For one entry: Write your name. Easy Peasy.

For another five entries: Email 5 of your friends about this giveaway and come back and tell me you emailed them or post on your own blog about this giveaway and then come back and leave a comment with your link to your blog.

For another three entries please Facebook or Twitter about this giveaway. Write: I just entered to win a Mary Kay Winterberry Gift Set at http://dawnandchase.blogspot.com you can too!

For one last entry: please follow my blog and comment that you are a follower.

So you have a total of 10 entries you can get.

You have until Midnight on Sunday February 21 to enter. The winner will be randomly chosen at random.org and I will announce the winner on Monday February 22. If you are the winner please contact me at cooptothehoop@hotmail.com and let me know where I need to ship this set to. If I don't hear from you by Wednesday February 24 I will have to pick another winner. Hope you win!

I am hoping to start doing a giveaway about once a month so check back on this blog to see what I will be giving away next.

Christmas Tales and goals for the New Year

2009-12-29T22:23:00.006-07:00

Well Christmas has come and gone and Chase and I had a wonderful year again with our families and each other. The Sunday before Christmas Chase and I went out to Clarkston to go to church and listen to the annual Christmas Cantada. It was so beautiful and spiritual. I always love going home to my home ward that I grew up in and seeing all of the people I know and talking with all of them.

Other highlights were on Christmas Eve, Chase and I went to his parents home and celebrated with them. We had a very yummy large dinner with ham and salads and Texas Roadhouse rolls (Thanks Lei). We made gingerbread houses and decorated them. Trev and Lei really wanted to do that just because they like to laugh at Chase and I trying to work together and arguing all the way while doing it. We each try to direct the other and think our own plan is the best. Trev and Lei made one together and then Zach and Bev, and Chase and I. I'm pretty sure that Trev and Lei's was the best one.
Next, we played The Beatles Rock Band. I loved it! I absolutely love the Beatles so I knew all of the songs and it was the funnest game ever.
We also opened presents from each other and we got spoiled. Chase's parents suprised us with a flat screen 32" TV. It was awesome. We had no idea. Now I will never get Chase away from the TV.

Chase and I also opened each other's presents while there. We got some fun things. I think I was more happy with what I got Chase than he was really. I suprised him with a Car CD player because the Galant he drives around doesn't have a CD player only a Tape player that doesn't play tapes just the radio. Oh well. I tried. I got some things for the house and that was nice.

On Christmas Day we slept in late and I got up and fixed pancakes and eggs (no bacon because it would make my hair stink, although I had some in the fridge) and gave Chase some nice breakfast. Then we got ready to go eat at My Grandparents house. We had ham and funeral potatoes and stuffed mushrooms and salads and homeade rolls and my grandmas best ever punch. Most of the cousins were there along with all of my brothers and sisters except Dan because he had to fly :( But Holly and the girls were there. We did get to see Dan on the 23rd though and sing some Christmas songs around the piano. We had a nice visit with everyone and opened gifts again from Grandma and Grandpa Clark. Darren and Ericka and the boys came down and it was so nice to see them because it had been a long time since we had seen them.

Later that afternoon we went to my parents house and visited and opened more gifts and was just able to be with one another. It is never boring at Mom and Dad's with all of the nieces and nephews. To see them just made my day. They were all so excited because it was Christmas and had fun new things to play with or wear. Justin even got a Ipod-lucky boy. Aparently Santa thought he was really good this year. He's even doing really awesome in school right now and middle school is tough. I can't believe my oldest Nephew is 12! Wow, I am getting old. I was his age when he was born, crazy!

Let's see. All in all it was a really nice Christmas and we are looking forward to the new year. We are hoping to have some changes in our life this year. We have some goals in mind we really want to get accomplished.

My/our goals for the New Year!:
1. Lose weight
2. Quit drinking pop. Period. I relapsed.
3. Get a 2 bedroom apartment with a yard for Tinkerbell.
4. Become more financially sound.

Our biggest and most personal goal this year together is:

I haven't posted about my new job because I didn't want to jinx it. But I do have a job-finally. I am working at TJ Maxx and I absolutely love it. It is so much fun and I love the people I work with. I am working part time right now but hope that they will eventually have me work more hours. I pretty much have done everything there. I cashier, put merchandise out, and work in the fitting rooms. I feel like I am learning quickly and the job is not too stressful for me.

Chase is still at CarQuest -3 years this past October. He still enjoys it. I have been encouraging him to maybe go to mechanic school and get ASE certified so that he can possibly do that as a career. But he still has his dream of becoming a Herpetologist. I guess we will see where the road leads us.

I've been wanting to go back to school and finish my degree lately. I hope that I can work that out soon so I can just get done and have my degree.

Have a Happy New Year. We are so thankful for our family and friends in our lives.

This is funny!

2009-12-03T13:37:00.001-07:00

Shooting at Ft. Hood in Texas

2009-11-05T15:44:00.003-07:00

I've just been watching Fox News and I heard that there was a shooting and 12 are dead and 31 wounded at Fort Hood. The media don't know who the shooter is (the military does but haven't released the name officially) but that he was a soldier about to be deployed and that he was upset about going. There are two other possible shooters in custody. I feel so bad for the families of those that have died or were wounded. I just wanted to post and say how I am praying for those families and I hope that you will do the same. In this world of violence and madness, it just saddens me every time something like this happens. God Bless America!

My (Not so happy) 23rd Birthday

2009-09-16T18:44:00.003-06:00

Well Yesterday was my 23rd birthday and it started out okay until I got the mail and there was something from Chase's Employer in a big fat envelope. Chase and I opened it on his lunch break and guess what good news was in there? Oh yeah Chase has been audited and his avg. amount of hours worked is like 32.17 hours over the past 18 weeks (so not his fault, his bosses) and he has to have a avg. of 35 hours to be considered full-time. Ok so they continue to go on that our INSURANCE has been DROPPED because of this as of 9/1/09 and mind you it is 9/15/09 when we got this. Knowing me I freaked out and started bawling after Chase left (got hold it in from him because I am so strong...not) and called my mom. I don't know what we're going to do. I did eventually calm down after a while. Anyone have some legal advice? I wonder if this is legal? They didn't even warn us that he would be dropped. Piece of crap employer. Did I mention, hello...looking for new and better job!

So that night Chase's family had a party for me and it was nice. We celebrated with my side of the family last Sunday. I had funfetti cake which was yummy with a cream cheese frosting which Chase's mom made. Alas there was no pictures taken but that's okay because I always forget the camera. I got money and some gift cards to Borders and American Eagle and a cute tote bag and today I went out and got me the purse I've been wanting for like a year (totally worth the money) and at Borders I got The Lost Symbol by Dan Brown (can't wait to read) and a CD- Taylor Swift (am I too old to love her and her music?).

Isn't news like your insurance being dropped great on your birthday? I thought so. Needless to say Chase goes down to his monthly doc appt. tomorrow ($140) and we have no insurance, and we have to buy his perscriptions at retail price. Chase has been looking into which meds are the cheapest retail, but its still going to be over $200 or so. Did I say that I hate my life? Well sorry I had to rant and rave, but how else can I vent?

Open Season

2009-09-02T21:46:00.002-06:00

Well we got up at 5:30 yesterday morning and got ready to head out ot Newton for opening day of Dove Season. Why do you have to always get up so darn early to hunt? Well I was pretty excited Monday night and couldn't sleep because it was my first time officially hunting with my own gun and not just hiking along. Well I didn't actually have my own gun, I used Chase's 12 gauge and he used his grandpas.
We went with Trevor (Chase's brother) and his friend Jordan Walquist. Leilani (my sis in law) also came but didn't actually hunt. We ended up having a lot of fun. And the biggest suprise of all was that I actually shot one! It was so exciting and fun to be out there walking around and looking to shoot dove. Chase got five and Trevor got seven.
Today I am so sore and I also fell in a hole and twisted my ankle bad and it is so swollen and I can hardly walk on it. I am such a klutz. My mom thinks I should get it x-rayed but I don't know if it is broke or just sprained. Now I haven't been able to go out today or tonight to hunt. Chase went back out again tonight and got five more. So it seems like we'll be eating dove sometime soon. I also cleaned the dove that I shot. The weird thing is that if you would have said I'd be hunting five years ago, I would have laughed. I am also planning on going spike elk hunting this October with Chase. I hope one of us gets one because we need the meat for this winter coming up.
I didn't get any pictures of us because I forgot the camera and I doubt any of my boys would have posed for a pic anyways.

Jackson Hole or Bust!!!

2009-07-22T17:08:00.004-06:00

So we just got back from our family trip to Jackson Hole and we had so much fun! We went on a hike up to Taggart Lake and it was gorgeous! We got to play in the water of the river in the Gros Ventre Campground. We went shopping to Jackson and ate at Bubba's (mmm....ribs....craving them now!). The last day Chase and I decided to go and have a picnic up at String Lake. It was pretty busy up there but was peaceful at the same time. I took my book and read and Chase went on a walk. He kept wanting to find a bear for some reason. I think he's crazy but alas, no bear this trip.

Little Red and my Man

2009-06-23T22:59:00.003-06:00

Well today was Chase's day off and he had a project to do. My little red needed new rotors, brake pads and axles. So Chase took on this project all on his own, with my own help here and there. So we got up and went to CarQuest to get the parts of course. We got a steal of a deal (obviously we would) because Chase gets the best discount for working there. Only now, he had to do the labor. The whole time while he was cussing and sweating over the job, he said it would have been worth the $300 labor to have a professional do it. He sure kept me laughing all day. It was so interesting watching him fix up our little red. I have memories of watching my dad out in the garage fixing our cars and him fixing up his 1967 Mustang from basically nothing to beautiful. Anyways, I had my doubts about Chase's capabilities but I shouldn't have. I was nervous the whole time that little red wouldn't get put back together again. It took us (well me watching and reading) and Chase sweating and working about 7 hours today, but we did it! I am so proud of Chase and am grateful that he can work on Cars and so we don't have to pay to have someone else fix it up. I have posted a pic of a suped up little red (ours doesn't look quite so hot) but thought you might enjoy the thoughts of driving this bad boy! I know you are so jealous.

It's Twins!!!!

2009-06-16T23:17:00.002-06:00

Well tonight, Chase and I went to visit my brother and sister-in-law's new baby girls up at the hospital! They both weighed 7 lbs 1 ounce. Isn't that strange? They were born early this morning. I am so happy for them and Ellie was so cute walking around to both of them and saying "baby A" or "baby B". She is a happy big sister right now. I did hear her say hello to Sophie though. So she's learning to tell them apart I think. I took my camera up there meaning to take pictures, but got caught up into holding them (I held Lily) and Chase held Sophie that I just forgot. So sorry no pictures posted. I'm sure though that Dan and Holly will post plenty of pictures on their blog. Isn't birth such a miracle? I was just in awe of these two little precious bundles. So that is the latest family news and news in our life for now. Happy Birthday Sophie and Lily! Here's a pic of the Olsen Twins since I didn't take any pics.

Some Exciting Fun Swap

2009-04-07T12:07:00.002-06:00

Hi all! I am so excited to tell you all about a swap I am hosting on www.swap-bot.com . This is such a fun website you can enter and participate in different swaps. I just participated in an apron swap and got such a cute apron from my partner. The swap that I am hosting is a fabric swap. What you do is get 1 Yard of fabric based upon what your partner would like and send it to them in the mail. Please check out my website and join if you like, it will be so much fun!

I swap with Swap-bot!

http://www.swap-bot.com/swap/show/34582

2009-03-17T21:22:00.001-06:00

This was a cute post from Strandz that I thought would be nice to share with all those that may read my blog. I totally agree with the words of President Ukdorf.

Happy Anniversary Chase!!!!

2009-03-10T19:47:00.002-06:00

Today is Chase and I's 2 year anniversary. Two years ago I married my best friend. Two years ago I got to be a princess for the day, it was such a perfect day. Two years ago, I got to become a Volkman and I am loving every minute of it. Happy Anniversary Honey, I love you so much!

Poetry

2009-02-19T16:19:00.003-07:00

I have had a hard past few weeks as some of you may know. But I have been on a journey of self-discovery. I have taken up things that I used to do and love. I am hesitant that I should post this poem I have written but I feel that I want people to know my thoughts right now. I have been writing in my journal my thoughts and my feelings. I feel that this is a good outlet for me.

Journey

Everything I do is for me
but is also for those around me
Every step backward I take
helps me to learn to take two steps forward
next time.

I am strong
I am brave
I am unique
I am beautifully clumsy me.

I may not have it all together
but I learn from my mistakes
Don't look back, look forward.
I have hope for the future.
The past is in the past.

I am blessed to be here on Earth
taking my journey beside my loved ones
hand-in-hand with my sweeetheart
I stumble....you pick me up.
Reaching for me to look up
into your pale blue eyes.
Your touch and gentle smile assures
me it is okay. Take my hand
and travel this path with me.

Our Wedding Pictures

2009-02-11T21:56:00.000-07:00

Make a Smilebox slideshow

Valentine's Gift

2009-02-11T20:32:00.004-07:00

So on March 10 it will have been 2 years for Chaswe and myself. I already received my valentines present, our wedding pictures on a cd. I decided to post some of my favorites. My soon to be sister-in-law helped me call my photographer and get them finally. That is one thing that I really like about her. She is a go getter. She isn't afraid to call people (unlike myself) and get things done.

On Monday night we called Trevor and Leilani to go to the movies with us. I picked the movie. I really wanted to see Push and we went. I totally loved the movie! It stars Chris Evans, Dakota Fanning, and Samuel L. Jackson plays the bad guy. Chris was super cute in this movie as well. Talk about some cute guy candy there!

" A shadowy government agency known as the Division is rounding up psychics for experiments designed to boost their powers and assemble the most commanding army the world has ever seen. Unfortunately, almost no one has ever survived these trials. Nick Gant (Chris Evans), a second-generation telekinetic, or "mover," has been in hiding since the Division murdered his father more than a decade earlier. He has found sanctuary in densely populated Hong Kong.

Nick is forced out of hiding when Cassie Holmes (Dakota Fanning), a 13-year-old clairvoyant, or "watcher," seeks his help in locating a briefcase that she claims holds $6 million. To find it, they will also have to find Kira, (Camilla Belle), an escaped "pusher" who is the only person ever to live through the Division's experiments. Pushers possess the most dangerous of all psychic powers: the ability to influence others' actions by implanting thoughts in their minds. But Cassie's presence soon attracts the attention of the Division's human bloodhounds, forcing Nick and Cassie to flee for their lives.

With the help of a team of expatriates with an array of special abilities, the unlikely duo winds a path through the city's most secret corners, trying to stay one step ahead of the authorities in their search for Kira. With Cassie's visions guiding them, the pair moves closer to their goal, but finds themselves competing with a family of deadly psychics for the suitcase. Even more dangerous is Division Agent Henry Carver (Djimon Hounsou), a powerful pusher who needs both the contents of the case and Kira in order to create an unstoppable paranormal militia. Outgunned and outnumbered, Nick, Cassie, Kira and their allies must figure out a way to outsmart Carver if they are to prevent him from carrying out his sinister plan."
http://www.tribute.ca/movies/Push/18015

Overall, I would probably give the movie an B+. This movie was also really clean. I believe it was rated PG-13 because it was a little intense and a little bit scary. There was no language and no sex scenes. I think it was similar to X-Men in a way with the people having special abilities.

I love my sweetie

2009-01-19T01:05:00.002-07:00

Here is a pic of Chase and I at my parents house on Chase's 24th birthday! I love Chase so much. Happy birthday honey! I am truly blessed to have Chase in my life. He brings me so much joy. I couldn't ask for a better man in my life. He and I just love to spend every minute we can together. He makes me laugh at myself and shows me how to not always be so serious and to just have fun.

2009-01-19T00:57:00.001-07:00

2009-01-19T00:57:00.000-07:00

My Love

2009-01-19T00:53:00.001-07:00

CuteintheKitchen

2008-12-09T23:16:00.001-07:00

Aprons

2008-12-09T22:28:00.004-07:00

As many of you may already know my mother and myself are making and selling aprons. They are becoming more practical in the kitchen again like they were in the 1950s and 1960s. I have displayed a few pics of some of the completed ones. What a unique and hand made gift you can give to a loved one this Christmas who will always remember you each time they wear it? And aprons are not only for the kitchen, you can also use them when you play hostess for a party and keep your clothing neat and tidy.

If anyone you know would be interested in one, please pass our website along to friends and family. Or you can contact us by phone at (435) 512-5454 or at : aprons.cuteinthekitchen@gmail.com

We also are setting up a website ( a work in progress) and planning on selling them on ksl.com and ebay and possibly other avenues online. We will ship them anywhere in the US and even gift wrap them for you.

Tell all of your friends and family about Cute in the Kitchen!

Something new....

2008-11-15T21:57:00.003-07:00

Chase and I had a fun *Free* date tonight. Our singles ward we were in before we were married had a reuinion for everyone who had gotten married and those who are still in the ward. We had so much fun! They had a Thanskgiving dinner and we watched a slide show of pictures since the ward started. Then they had swing dancing and Chase and I attemped to dance. I really was suprised that Chase actually tried to dance with me. After when we were driving home, he actually said that he liked it. I was very suprised with how bad I stunk at it. I guess I have never really learned that type of dancing.

I felt like a complete idiot but we had fun anyways together and catching up with our friends there. The pic of us is in front of the Nauvoo Temple when we went to Chase's cousin's wedding back in Nebraska and we got to visit Nauvoo and Carthage Jail and Farr West. It was so much fun. The other pic is of a drawing Chase made in the sand on our Honeymoon!

Some summer pics

2008-11-05T11:59:00.003-07:00

I thought I would add some pics of us and what fun things we did this summer. Two are in Jackson Hole from our yearly camping trip with my family. The other one is in my Grandma Clark's backyard. Enjoy...

Pictures

2008-10-29T21:52:00.001-06:00

More Pictures of the soapbox coming soon......

We're Baaaack!

2008-10-29T20:37:00.002-06:00

So the move is over. We are now officially living in a shoebox. Estimated square footage: 150. I am dead serious! Those who have visited this lovely new apartment will attest to my truthfulness. I cannot tell you how much I go crazy with this new adjustment.

It is like going from the Taj Mahal (Grandma's house) to a little shack. And my desire to decorate has not declined, though it must stop because I have nowhere to put all of my stuff. (Ericka, I need some advice here) I don't want to make this little apartment cluttered, but I want it to look homey and organized. I will post some pics of the apartment, excuse the boxes still around I just don't know where to put them all! I want to paint the wall in the bedroom and in the living room so at least we have some colors! I really liked the colors Ericka chose in their new home. Their baby blessing was so nice and they have such a cute home up in Burley!

We finally got the internet set up here so I can now do more blogging. It has almost been a month! I was getting really sick of going to the Logan library to get online, although it gave me an excuse to look at books which I don't mind at all!

I have all these projects I want to do, but I don't know where to start. I want to paint the bookcase, paint the two walls in this apartment, paint the little chest in the bathroom and work on my Christmas projects for gifts. Does anyone else out there not know where to start with these projects?

I think my cat is depressd. I feel so bad for her. She is cooped up in this tiny little apartment and we haven't let her go outside because....well, I guess I am just worried she will get lost in this new place. She sleeps way more than she used to, she eats a lot more and she is getting overweight because she doesn't have much physical activity to do since she isn't outside at all.

I am currently reading The Host by Stephenie Meyer and I am about 100 pages away from being done. Now this is her first adult novel she has done besides the Twilight series and I must say, I am really loving this book. I really like it a lot better than her last book she published and the last in the series, Breaking Dawn. Am I the only one that was let down by that one?

I have such a long list of Books I want to read. Denise usually suggests some of them to me as well as others I like.

On the waiting list:

A Lake in the Clouds by Sara Donati (third book in the series)
Ferney by James Long
The Historian by Elizabeth Kostova (needs to be finished)
Into the Wild by Jon Krakauer
Eldest by Christopher Paolini (needs to be finished)
4th book in the Work and the Glory series

Well hopefully I will be able to find the time for these books as well as my projects. School is keeping me pretty busy. I am really enjoying the two night classes I am taking down at Bridgerland. One is a Medical Terminology class and the other one is Drug Dosages and Calculations which are pre-requisites to apply to the LPN program there. Hopefully about in a year and a half I will be finally done, and able to start making good money for us. I've wasted so much time with school. I've attended USU for 8 semesters and should be graduated but kept changing majors (Business, Nursing, Public Health) and so much money from student loans have been spent on a degree I haven't gotten from there. Thank goodness I have a sponsorship place for BATC who will pay for my schooling! I want my education to be worth something you know? The investment I've put into education needs to get some return sometime!

Also I am looking for a job so anybody with suggestions, or what not, please let me know.

Have a good week!

Found a place...we think

2008-09-27T00:46:00.006-06:00

Ok. We think we have a place. Thank goodness. It is small only a 1 bedroom, but I guess we will adjust. From a 5 bedroom, 2 bathroom house, to 1 bedroom 1 bath.. Oh joy. I cannot wait. I cant tell you how much I've enjoyed having 2 bathrooms. It is wonderful. Chase had his and I had mine> There was so much room. We can't even take everthing we own because it won't fit. We have to leave the table and chairs and just use the kitchen bar.

On a plus side, there is a DISHWASHER! I don't remember ever being so excited about an appliance. I am daydreaming of using it right now...I will be saving myself 1-2 hours per week of doing the dishes by hand.

A couple of things I want to talk about tonight. Did anyone else catch the presidential debate that wasn't over 40? Well, Chase is crazy about politics and so we of course, are tuned in tonight. I thought McCain did so much better than Obama. I sat down tonight and tried to listen with an open mind and trying to pretend that I am undecided upon who I am going to vote for. Chase would disown me if I voted for Obama, you know. But I really tried to listen to Obama and see his points and promises. I'm sorry to say, he is just full of empty promises. I just felt like McCain did such a good job and I think people are crazy to follow and believe Barrack. Having extended family members who are democratic and are voting for Obama, I apologize. I don't think though, that people planning on voting for him, have any idea who he is and what his plans are. I think they just hear things from on TV and think that is truth. These people don't go and try to study out his policies and past voting record, they just jump on the bandwagon.

Am I in love with McCain? No.But I would much rather have someone in the White House with much experience than very little. Would you go and see a doctor that has only had 2-4 years of education and think he would do a good job performing a surgery on you? No. Doctors have nearly 12 years of education before they can practice on their own. The same goes with politics. Barrack has just had too little experience. He has been a senator for 4 years, 2 of which, has been campaigning for president.

People say McCain is too old, that he can't run this country. I would feel very comfortable with my Grandpa Clark or Denton being the president right now. Why? Because they are very smart. They have seen many things and know much more than I do. Older citizens are very wise. They have been through wars, and tough economic times. They know. The other thing is my Grandpa's have tons of energy--much more than myself. I think McCain is the same way, I think he has many more years of life left in him.

I am going nuts over Chase's newfound passion. I would much rather take the sports. I think politics are very corrupt and biased depending upon which source you read/hear things from. In the car, we listen to Rush Limbaugh and Sean Hannity. It is okay once in a while. I get home from work and Chase is watching TV, but not anything interesting. No it is Fox news channel. He likes to watch about 2-3 hours of this channel straight. It will have Hannity and Combes, and On The Record with Greta Van Sustern. But every night? Do we really have to watch it? I feel like I am married to an old man sometimes. Seriously. What 23 year old man watches these types of channels? I am just praying for him to change it to a football game or something. That would be more interesting.

I think Chase should major in Political Science or something since he has such a passion for politics. I have mentioned this offer thinking he would put aside foolish thoughts of being a snake wrangler. But alas, to no avail.

The second thing I wanted to mention here is, I am having a conscience attack. With the apartment, we weren't exactly forthcoming on the fact that Tinkerbell would be moving in with us. I guess I wouldn't mind so much, except that the landlord's grandma lives in the neighboring building and she trims the lawn and so I know she will see we have a cat. I don't know whether to be upfront with her about it and see if she will let us, or have her find out later (hopefully never) that we have a cat? She is a really good cat. She doesn't use the litter box. She goes outside and is very clean and doesn't claw things and she is usually outdoors more than indoors.

What do you think? Aarghh. It is driving me nuts and I am worried. I don't know what to do. We are hoping to be moved in by the 1st.

And the countdown begins.....

2008-09-22T14:10:00.002-06:00

So we have 8 days to find a place to move. Lucky us. I hate moving. I hate packing. Grandma's house finally sold and so we have to be out by the 30th. Do we have a place to live? No. Have we been looking for apts? Yes. Does life really suck right now? Yes. If we can't find a place, I guess here we come parents house! My parents house. I never thought either of us would have to move in with our parents, but if we cannot find a place, we have no other options.

On Friday night after work, we went to look at a one bedroom home in Amalga. We instantly fell in love with it and we thouht it would be really fun living out in the country again. It had new carpet and new linolieum (gasp! I know). We had never lived in a place with new carpet and I was already daydreaming of how I would decorate this cute little home.

We thought we'd think about it at least until Saturday night after we met with my friend who does real estate and see if we could get approved for a home loan. Things went good there and they pre-approved us for a loan up to $120,000. I have been looking for months at the various homes for sale online. So Chase and I discussed our options and couldn't decide what to do. So we let Satuday pass by without calling and letting that lady know whether or not we wanted to rent that cute house.

We prayed about it and we just couldn't decide. I started thinking maybe now wouldn't be the right time to buy a house, maybe in another year. So on Sunday, I told Chase to call the lady and tell her we would take it. She told us that someone had called her on Saturday and said that they wanted it. We were so bummed. It was perfect. I don't know what we are going to do.

If anyone out there knows of a place for rent, please let us know! I look in the newspaper every day and go online to a couple different websites as well, but to no avail.

There will be so many things that I will miss about living in this home. However I will say that I won't miss those stupid dogs barking on either side of our house on Saturday mornings, when I am trying to sleep in. No I don't think I will miss them at all. They bark constantly. Our neighbors dogs to the south of us know us, so when we step outside they dont' bark at us. However the stupid dog to the North constantly barks at us and growls even if I just open up the front door partially. It is a black lab and seems really tough, then I heard the neighbor kids calling her Princess and I about died of laughter. Some maucho dog that is called Princess. Ha! More than one time have I thought about loading Chase's BB gun and going out in the middle of the night and give it a little sting between the eyes.

Those of you that know me, know how much I love animals (minus snakes) and so it is really an annoyingly bad dog if I am thinking about assassinating it. Today I registered for a couple of classes down at Bridgerland. I am really excited about it. I have felt like I have been wasting my life away not learning for the past few months. I am taking Drugs, Dosages and Calculations and Medical Terminology. They are a couple of the pre-requisites needed to apply for the LPN program down there. After these classes are done in December I still have to take a couple of USU classes (you can take them at BATC) before applying into that program. I am really excited about just getting it all done and over with. At least I will feel like the $10,000 or so that I have already spent on student loans up at USU were for something and not a waste.

Fall/ Halloween

2008-09-09T06:14:00.005-06:00

I am so excited that fall is here. I am tired of the heat of summer. Fall is my favorite season, I love the leaves and Halloween and Thanksgiving. I painted pumpkins last year and sat them out on the porch. They were really fun and I got the idea from the October 2007 issue of Better Homes and Gardens Magazine.

This year I am trying to think of another new and creative decoration for the pumpkins. I went onto the website yet again thanks to BHG. I can't believe I actually like looking at this magazine. My mom always used to subscribe to it and I thought, "Geez Mom, could you order a more boring magazine?" but now I have my own home, I am reallly into magazines like this. If anyone has some good ideas for decorating your home this fall, let me know.

Tagged

2008-09-09T05:56:00.002-06:00

TAGGED!
Alyssa tagged me! What you do is post these rules: List 3 joys in your life; 3 fears; 3 goals; 3 collections/obsessions; & 3 random facts. Then you tag 5-6 others at the end. So, here I go...

Joys:

1. Chase 2. Reading 3. Chocolate and/or Pepsi

Fears:

1. Snakes 2. Throwing up 3. Failure

Collections/Obsessions:

1. Shoes 2. Mary Kay 3. Seinfield

Random:

1. Why can't I sleep? 2. I hate doing the dishes 3. I'm hungry

I Tag:

Brit/Heath, Chelsea/Bret, Dan/Holly, Ericka/Darren

Summer's Over...Almost

2008-08-17T03:24:00.006-06:00

Well, I finally got around to posting something new on my blog. Always like to write novels here. Hmmm...maybe Denise and I can compete. Well it is the middle of August and summer is winding down. The last couple of days have been much cooler and that has been a relief because we haven't had to keep the fan running 24/7 in our house. Tonight we had Chase's aunt and uncle and their daughter come over and take a grand tour of the house. We had a good time showing them around the house. They really liked it. They just moved to smithfield into a Victorian home much like the one we are living in. So they wanted to come and compare. They were of course, captivated by it. It is just a unique home, it just has so much character. I really wish we could buy it. Maybe if I got a second job and my Mary Kay business took off and Chase got this new job and he took on a second job, well maybe then could we afford it.

I guess it is all about priorities. We are so used to living in Smithfield, we don't really want to move back to Logan. It is just so much quieter here, much like Clarkston and Newton but not clear out there in the boonies. When we lived in Logan, there was always neighbors noises we could hear and at night it seemed like the cop sirens were blaring all night long. We were down on the Island so maybe that is why. It is sad, it seems like that is becoming much the run down area of Logan. A lot of poor people live there as well as sketchy people. So anyways, we have been looking around Smitfield for a new place to move to. We looked at one just around the corner and we would stay in the same ward and everything. The price was a little too high for us. I guess we are counting on Chase's parents neighbors. Their mother just passed away recently and the house next door to them was hers and they don't really know what to do about the house yet and they offered to let us rent from them for a really cheap price. It would be nice because we would be in the same ward as Chase's parents and like two houses away from them as well.

And Tinkerbell would like having a big yard like she has been spoiled to having here. I really hope we can move into that house and not have to share walls with any people ever again! I just wish we were five or ten years down the road financially and we could just buy this home we are in. I've become so attached to it, being my Grandma's house all my life and coming to visit and play in the yard as a kid.

I am kindof saddened that I will not be attending USU this fall. I slacked off to much and now we just can't afford to go right now. I want to finish so bad and just be done with it. But now I know I am not going, I feel sad that I can't go out and buy school supplies or my textbooks or clothes. Chase isn't going to go either. We just both thought that we can't afford for either of us to go right now. We have too many bills and even if just one of us went, well that would be like 1/4-1/2 of our income less a month. I guess it is all about priorities again. Do we put food on the table and pay our bills, or go broke?

I took this picture outside our house last week and the sky was so beautiful and I just had to take this pic.

How about those Olympics? I have thoroughly enjoyed watching them. I liked watching Michael Phelps win all of those medals, but I would have to say my favorite so far has been women's gymnastics. I have always liked watching that since I was little and I always wanted to be a gymnast. My mom never let me because she said it was dangerous and I was too tall to do gymnastics. No fair.

Here I am writing on my blog again at 3:30 am. Why cant I Sleep? Aarrgh! I lay down and I can't shut my mind off. I keep thinking about what I need to do like the dishes and laundry and oh I need to get online and make sure I don't miss the deadline for the Mary Kay fall catalogues for my customers...and the list goes on and on. Am I the only one that struggles with this issue at night? I would think that many women have a similar issue because we keep thinking about different things that need to be done and it is just so hard to relax and fall asleep.

My Nightmare and preview of Breaking Dawn.....no pun intended

2008-08-02T13:52:00.005-06:00

I first must start off with a warning for this blog. I have much to write about but if you are one of those millions of fans reading Breaking Dawn by Stephenie Meyer right now, I admonish you to stop when I break in my story and begin discussing the book in depth unless you want to spoil this book for yourself.

I am certain I am not the first to have already written something regarding this book already today and it has been released my time now for 14 hours. But it would be 16 for New York and I'm sure people have already completed the book. And have written their insights and thoughts about the book to spoil it for others. That is NOT what I am trying to do. So please, take my advice and stop when I admonish you to.

Now I happen to have a Journal I write in from time to time, but lately I have really been trying to write my thoughts down to try to analyze them. To analyze myself and possibly learn somethinng about myself and my behaviors. I think if I can figure out a way to breakdown the way I think the way I do, I can be powerful. No I am not intending to be the President of the United States or something. I mean powerful with my own mind. And conquer that which debilitates me, makes me a weak person. I can fight it and I will win. I cannot do that which was done to me. Sorry Aunt Kris. You know how much I love you. If I did this, how would I explain that in the next life to MY neices and nephews? I can't leave them. I can't leave my family. I need them and strangely, I think they need me too.

Now I will cut to my writing from my Journal.

I guess I will try one of Stephenie Meyer's tricks and italicize my writing for my own thoughts within my own writing. I have no one to talk to except this stupid little book. Confession: I didn't sleep. Why didn't I sleep, you ask? Well because I spent the night reading . I was one of the midnight shoppers at Wal-mart for the new Twighlight series books, Breaking Dawn. Ha. Hear my story and you'll know that it is, BREAKING DAWN. Me. Stop. Lets flashback to the early teenage Dawn years.

I have always loved reading. Period. Some of my first concious memories of my being revolved around my mother and I sitting on the Living room Hand-me-down couch next to, or on Her lap, happily reading to me a stack of picture books. Confession: Again. Sorry. I seem to remember very few childhood memories. The ones I do have are shadowed or sad. Not that I didn't have a happy childhood. I did. I had a perfect family. I don't know why my mind decided to keep only these, but maybe Aunt Kris' dying affected me more than I thought. I was eight. No, wait. It was April 7. My Birthday was that fall. Ok I was seven. Because I remember my cousin Gabes and I getting baptized and she wasn't there.

I miss her. I ache for her. If I could just see her one more time, just for a moment. To kknow she's okay- and that God loves her. Maybe I feel uncertain because I had a therapist tell me as well as a seminary teacher tell me that people who committ suicide are condemned. To purgatory, or hell, or whatever. I believed them . Maybe a part of my subconcious still does. To an extent.

I lied. I have felt her prescence time and again throughout my life, like she is my Guardian Angel or something. I've spent many a dark night in my mind and there was always someone there for me. Guarding me. From myself. My personal monster within. So in a way, I feel like she is ok. I feel her personality so strongly I can almost hear her contagious laugh, deep brown eyes cringed in the corners showing her amusement. I Feel her character traits more than ever. It is, what? Smug, mischevious, bubbly intoxicating personality. Maybe its this house. I feel that the veil is really thin here. I don't know why. Maybe it is Grandpa Stewart's passing and Grandma Margaret being alone and sad, that God allowed it to be this way. For Grandma. She always said that she dreamt of him often, in this very room I am now sitting. In this exact place. Also she said she talked to him. Did she ever say she saw him? Maybe after Grandma Margaret passed away, God meant to seal it back up but she saw me and knew everything about my soul then, she saw I would still need help. I do. I am glad.

I've never felt afraid here, in their home. Many people have asked me if I've felt creepy living here. Staying here, like they know something I don't. Like this house is haunted. Ha! That's funny! Yes I feel spirits here all the time. But I'm not scared. The thing is--I know these spirits, they are good ones. Grandma, Grandpa, Aunt Kris. They are protecting me-us. If I listen very cloesly with my spirit, I can hear them. Feel them. I'm okay.

Now please don't drag me off to the looney bin. I'm sure I would get along well there probably but I am not crazy. Geez, I got waay-- off track. I usually do that when I write. Never have I had a problem ever in school with writing a paper. Ha. I over-write and then have to edit out stuff to fit into the allotment.

As you can recall, my original intention was to write about the nightmare I just had (3 hours ago) and suddenly I'm on a completely different topic. I have no one to talk to. If I tell Chase he won't let me read this book. He won't let me read period. He's always looking for a way to prevent my reading. This would be all too convenient for him. I feel guilty even thinking the thought in my mind. Now I feel guilty even writing it.

Who do I call? Denise? My mom? Darren? No, I'm sure if I told them all about this nightmare, that they would over-react and tell me to stop reading. Immediately. I seriously contemplated the best of these three and my decision was Darren. I had my phone out and I was about to dial the number. But I thought, he would listen to me and understand but he is my brother and very protective and now he is a therapist, so I'm sure he would tell me to stop reading the book. That I was stupid if this plot was really getting into my mind this bad.

I can't call Denise, she probably although rare that this is, has not started it yet because she pre-ordered it and it hasn't gotten to her house yet. So I am actually reading this before her. That is a first. I usually ask her for recommendations for books. Books she has already read. We are of the same mind. Our passion for reading. But I can't call her this time and ask her about the book and my stupid dream without giving the book away. I'm only on 332, about halfway and I don't know what to do. I'll probably go workout with Gabby at the Sports Academy and then come back home and start reading it again.

I have an over-imaginative mind. back to my early teenage years. I would frequently read books and then dream about them. I became the book. The characters. Their fantasy world and story would become my owwn. I would be that herione or that damsel-in-distress. Whatever, I didn't care. As long as I could escape to their world and not mine. Not that awkward thing called life. More specifically, middle school. And breasts and hormones. And boys. Oh, how I liked boys. And chased them.

I happened to read a few books I dreamed about (nothing new), but they were darker tales. I had nightmares about them. I really don't think these books were so bad or scary. I just made them that way in my mind. I would go off on a sub-plot of the story. Make it my own. Weave my thoughts into the story, to make it my own twisted metal of a heap, like there was a sudden car accident of bound up metal in my mind. Like I was weaving the beads onto my dream-catcher with the sinew, braiding it around and around the circle.

I happened to leak these dreams to my therapist-and my mom. I can't remember if I told my mom or my therapist did. Whichever, didn't matter. My mom freaked out of course, and tried to stop me reading fantasy novels, like they were the Plague. She couldn't really stop me from reading-ha-what I wanted really, but I started to believe her. Maybe if I read other books like Anita Stansfield's Arianna books, or a Jack Weyland Novel, say one of the 50 or 60 he wrote, maybe I wouldn't keep having nightmares.

So I tried it, and it worked. I would still read the occassional fantasy novel and devour them, but my nightmares stopped. Eeew. I even tried reading a Lurlene McDaniel novel titled Saving Jessica to have something to read. No offense to her but I don't know how some authors get published and write a whole bunch of stupid books. Seriously. The plot-line for this page-turner (jest) was this girl in high school who got really sick and found out she had kidney failure and she was in love and if she didn't get a transplant, she would die and loose her high school boyfriend. Blah. I'd rather watch TV. And that is really saying something because I don't even have the TV on when Chase isn't here. Nope. If it were up to me, I would be just fine with no TV at all. Hey I could live 100 years ago and be just fine. But Chase loves TV and so I couldn't take that away from him, although I've suggested it in a nice manner to save money.

Money we don't have. It's not like he is watching total waste of time things. He Loves the
Discovery channel and the History channel. I wish he watched sports more. I'm starting to get sick of the Mythbusters and Dirty Jobs oh and most of all, Dogfights. Blah. War. He really used to watch sports more when we first started dating and I was totally fine with that because I had grown up around that. Darren watched them all the time. I liked watching them. As long as I could be with my brother. He taught me things. Played catch with me. Played basketball with me.

However, I could never really learn to like Football. Still don't. I guess if I was understanding the game a little better, I would. I know the basics. I just don't seem to see a real point with the game. And the padding. And hitting each other. Must be a man thing. The other sports make sense in my mind. They really do. With basketball, we will watch quite a bit. But he doesn't call me watchig because we'll be sitting on the couch and I will have a book in front of me. But I do both. I keep track of the score and watch but also read as well. See women can multi-task pretty efficiently.

I miss the Cubs; and the Braves. What I wouldn't do to sit down and watch a full baseball game with my brother Darren.

Anyways, Chase always seems to keep track of sports but I don't know how. He will glance at the sports section of the newspaper and maybe read an article or two. But he listens to talk radio in the car when he is driving at work and so I think there is a sports AM station. If I am turning any of you men out there on to this, you will definitely thank me. The station is 1280 the Zone. There are these two guys (I believe they are located in Salt Lake) who do the commentary. I think their names are Jeff and Mike. Anyways they are really interesting and I find myself agreeing with them and they discuss the various sports and the local sports as well. Not enough of the Aggies, but mostly the Utes and some BYU. But that is good. So any of you men out there or women, this is really actually a good show they have on every weekday. I think they do it in the mornings.

Oh here I am running on again. Back to the story.

Maybe it is because I am the baby in my family but there is just something about an older brother....some bond. I feel so close with my sisters, but this is entirely different. I wouldn't say I am any closer to my brothers, but it is like protection or something. I seriously thought they were both perfect and there wasn't any mistake they could make that would make me love them less. And there hasn't been. I now see they are both human, news to me, but I still see them with that glory of perfectness. They are fiercly loyal to me, as I can remember one or two memories regarding the boys I dated. Ha ha. Danny is more direct with his protectiveness of me. Darren, more subtle, but always in tune with my thoughts. Like he can read me and what I am thinking. Well I don't know if they could get away with murder in my book, but I would find a way to forgive them. Someway somehow. Ha.

I can even remember Danny getting into it with Chase back in the day. Fiercly loyal. Like I said. He would probably die for me. To protect me from anything hurting me. His baby sis. I think things are really starting to fall into place with those two. For a while they didn't see eye to eye, but I think they both understand that it kills me if I don't have both of them in my life. I really want our family to be close and so what? We keep continuing not getting along. Like that works. Psaw. If we want to be an eternal family with each other, we have to get along with each of our brother and sister's spouses as well. Sure we each didn't pick them out, but our brother or sister did, and there has got to be a reason for that. I trust all of them completely and so why wouldn't they be able to pick their match? Luckily, I think I am blessed with the "adopted" family members I have. Some families don't have it this good. Even brothers and sisters won't get along. Add the spouses and it just gets worse.

So Holly, Denise, Ericka, Darcie. Although I don't think Darcie blogs. And so probably won't read this. Whomever reads this blog. Don't get me in trouble! With my brothers for this. What I've said.

Harry Potter? Yep. Devoured them. Of course, I dreamed of them. Never a nightmare though. Then I happened upon these lovely novels of Stephenie Meyers' creation. Well, actually my lovely sister recommended them to me. Thank you Denise. And that is complete honesty here. I can't imagine NOT reading them.

****OK HERE IS THE PLOT SPOILER.***** I WARN YOU. DO NOT CONTINUE READING ANY FURTHER UNTIL YOU HAVE COMPLETED THIS NOVEL, OR AT LEAST GOTTEN TO PAGE 332.

I don't remember if I had nightmares about the first 3 novels. I don't think I did. Maybe day-dreamed about it. And Edward, oh Edward. Yes, he is very good looking. But then there is Jacob too. I love Edward but Jacob is so loyal, so fierce. So animalistic. Bella's best friend. How could she NOT love Jacob? How could I? Okay so I think it is Jacob. In my mind. I would chose him. I'm halfway through this novel and still thinking there's a chance.

There has got to be some way for Jacob to win still. There's still a chance however miniscule that is. Why am I still holding onto this thought? Bella is Married. they had a Honeymoon for crying out loud. --Sidenote: I wondered how the author was going to go about this scene in my head. Since this is only a young adult novel. I didn't know how she would handle it. I think she came through with flying colors. Although, secretly I wanted to know more. But she is writing this for young adults and so I thinks she did outstandingly well and that parents shouldn't be concerned about any too graphic love scene so far as I have read. She kinds of fades out, leaves one to their own imagination. I love that.

My sister and I were having a debate about Diana Gabaldon's Outlander series regarding this very issue. At some point we have both thought that she is too descriptive with the love scenes. I feel almosts guilty reading them. But her writing is so enticing. Intoxicating. She is a very thourogh writer and so very descriptive. This is her style. This is the way she is. So it makes sense for her to write this way. In my mind.

So back to Breaking Dawn. Stop here now! She is pregnant. Why don't I get that? She is 4 days away from giving birth to this monster! See there I am thinking just like Jacob. Maybe it is because she is telling this part of the story from his point of view. I don't know. Am I the only one out there feeling still so loyal to Jacob?

The nightmare I had. I blended both A Breath of Snow and Ashes and Breaking Dawn into one dream/book. Claire Fraser was there. I was pregnant. I don't know if I was Bella or Me. But Jacob was there as well as Jamie Fraser. Jamie and Claire are from Diana Gabaldon's books, to not make anyone confused. Claire is a modern-day doctor who goes back in time to Scotland in the 1700's and falls in love with Jamie, a devilishly handsome man. Jamie is tall, over 6 feet and has bright red hair. Jamie wins hands down if I were to have to pick between Edward, Jacob or him. But maybe it is because I have now been through 6 books of Gabaldon's and am still eating it up.

Back to the dream. So I (whomever that is) was pregnant. So much like Bella. And there was the little monster in me that was half-vampire and it was doing the same thing to me like Bella to her. Breaking down her body. Beating it up. This occured to me in my dream at the time that it was such a weird feeling of being pregnant. I had never experienced this before, but have watched my sisters and sisters in laws become mothers and experience that. So maybe to a point, I can empathize with them. Definitely there is no way that I could know how that felt, yet I did and it was strange.

So Claire was checking me. And she was frowning. Looking at my bulge as it punched and kicked me. You could tell from her mirror face that something was not right. So I was very worried. Then I remember we were in this examining room/sports room (I can remember basketball hoops all around) finny what the mind does. And all of a sudden this man came in and starting kicking me while on the floor and beating me up and nobody could help me. I guess I felt like it was when Marsali and Claire got assaulted in their whisky making barn. Marsali was very pregnant and a bunch of men came upon her and Claire to steal the whisky. They kidnap Claire and have her captive for days. They rape her several times even though she is like 50 or older. This part of the book was really hard for me to read because it was scary. Brianna was raped too and I didn't like that part either. The men left Marsali for dead and set the barn burning.

Anyways, if you don't want to continue reading that is fine. Just another warning because the dream gets worse. I don't want to be too graphic to anyone or offend them. You can stop now. I've said the sain part of the dream. And then it goes crazy.

So the baby begins to eat it's way out from my stomach at the same time this man is beating me and then the man holds me down and cuts off my whole stomach completely. I am just laying there with a huge hole in my abdomen. And the monster is out. And he is green. Don't know where that came from. Maybe he is the incredible hulks offspring.

So Claire is freaking out that I will die and bleed to death and Jacob picks up the cut off part of my stomach and pulls out something else in the stomach. It is a little Jacob. So I don't know how he got me pregnant but I guess did somehow. Or maybe I was going off of the theroy that Carlisle said about vampires having 25 chromosomes and humans having 23 and Jacob, 24. So the baby could have mixed between and vampire and human, possibly 24 chromosomes which would make him like Jacob. A werewolf.

Edward and Jacob are there by my side and each of them are holding a baby and they ask which one I want to keep because the other must die. They both look into my eyes. Both have full love for me. What do I do? And then it got really gory and I felt like I was gagging on blood. (Yet another part from the book perhaps?) of Bella drinking blood? Probably.

Thankfully, I awoke with a start at that point. I was so disoriented. I didn't know where I was. My nightmare took place from 8:30 am-11:30 am.

I had stayed up until 6:30 am reading the book, before finally deciding to go lie down because although my mind didn't want to stop reading, my body won out. I stumbled into bed with Chase and he mumbled something in his sleep and held me close.

Then his alarm went off at 7:00 he had to go to work. So I got up with him (1/2 hour sleep) and made him a lunch and we both got to thinking about Tinkerbell. Where was she? When did we see her last? Neither of us could remember seeing her for like 12 hours or more. She usually stays outside and then will just come meow by the door for the occasional food or water for 5 minutes and then she is back outside. She decides to be out there. Not us. I wish she was around more.

So I went outside to look for her. I called her name and called her. She didn't come. Which was strange. Normally, even if she was a ways away, she would hear me and come running. Chase was still in bed. Pretending to sleep. He said when I got back in that he could hear her meowing. Where was she? I looked all over the house. I couldn't find her. So I tried it again. Chase said it sounded like she was right in the bedroom with us or close by. So I walked around to the front of the house. Right next to the front steps and called her and lo and behold, she was in the floor/basement.

I was immediately furious. Somebody had showed the house the day before. I don't think Taylor actually did. I think it was another realtor. Because Taylor knows we have the cat and she has followed him down to the basement before if he takes people but he always tells us that she went down there with him and she may be still down there or something. I heard nothing. So I figured it was another realtor showing the house. Maybe they didn't realize that the cat had came down the stairs with them. Maybe they did and were just too mean and left her locked down in the basement. Maybe it was on purpose, or accident. Regardless, it was inexcusible.

We never go down in the basement unless there is a problem with the water heater or the heater. Other that that, it is a black-widow infested (100% sure) cobwebby, crumbly basement. Eeek I still feel crawly thinking about being down there this morning. We saw her through the vent in the side just under the porch. And we knew that there was various crawl spaces that a cat could get up into from that basement because parts of the foudation are crumbly and visible. So we tried to see if we called her from the basement if she could make her way back to us the way she got in there.

Not to any avail. We couldn't even hear her when we were down there. So we decided we would have to pry the vent/catdoor (makeshift) out and she could crawl out this way. Because she came right up to the outside of it and was trying to get out. It was 1-2 inch metal squares so as much as she tried, there was absolutely no escape. She was crying and was scared and we did finally get the door pried open and she came out but she seemed really dehydrated and hungry. She came in and ate and drank water and then she was back out.

Like there was no big deal. Like she had forgotten her hell. She thanked us and purred. Wow I must really be losing it, or sleep-deprived like Ericka is now facing. Tink wanted to be outside again. Hopefully she is ok still.

And there is the end to my long-story and never ending chapter of my crazy life!

Ode to the Toilet

2008-07-30T02:44:00.005-06:00

Without further ado, I give to you a beautiful picture of this porcelain princess. Now don't you wish you had one of these puppies in your home? Eh? Now the toilets from our home were probably brand new in 1920. I am pretty sure of it. I was trying to find a picture that would closely match what our toilet looks like but to no avail.

Here I am again writing on my blog at 3 a.m. Yet another night of no sleep. What is wrong with me? I take plenty of medication that should make me sleepy, but I cannot sleep. Tonight was an adventure for us, to say the least. When I got home, we went down to Chase's parents home and had dinner with them and then went over and visited Grandpa and Grandma Denton. We got back home at 8:30 and the house was stinking from all of the dirty dishes. So alas, I had to give in and finally do them. While I was working on that chore for the evening, all of the suden I hear a scream and Chase comes darting out of the bathroom. Those of you familiar with my house the little bathroom is just off of the kitchen so Chase comes flying out of the bathroom like a bat out of hell. I ask him what is wrong and he says that the toilet overflowed and there is water spilling out all over the bathroom floor. Now I don't know if it is a man thing, but it seems like little brain is used in these situations. Chase immediately starts grabbing the paper towels just on the side of the sink and throwing them on the ground. He had almost gone through a hole role when I asked him what the heck he was thinking and that paper towels are expensive. I'm not sure what was going through his mind to make this smart action to battle all of the water on the floor of that bathroom, but he was freaking out about all of the water. I took off my dish gloves and dashed to get some towels to lay down on the floor to sop up all of the water. Men are wonderful but I just wonder what their thought process is from time to time.

Convienently at the same moment I am attempting to clean up the mess and have Chase help me, he decides that he has to go the bathroom right away and sneaks off to the other bathroom. I was so frustrated with him at that point, I was about ready to let him have it but I refrained and decided to focus on the positive things my husband does for me. I was busy all night and didn't get to sit down until 11:30 by the time I cleaned up the bathroom and did the dishes and went to the grocery store and then took a shower.

As I was thinking about this blog and a picture that suited this blog, I decided to look up toilets on Google to see what I could find (picture-wise) about toilets. I ran upon many websites dedicated to toilets and there are a bunch of strange wacky things on the websites. I thought to myself, "what kind of people have time on their hands to create a website particularly focusing on toilets?" Who are these people and what time do they have in their life to sit down and create a website with various pictures and stories regarding toilets? I found so much different information that I could write a report just about toilets.

2008-07-22T03:07:00.000-06:00

One of my favorite pictures of the Mormon Row barn and the Tetons in the background.

Vacation-Time

2008-07-22T02:31:00.003-06:00

The annual Cooper family vacation has come and gone. I can't believe it is already over! I looked forward to it all summer! We had so much fun while up in Jackson Hole! We went hiking and swimming and just had a blast. Everyone got along really well, which was a relief. There weren't any major accidents or problems and everyone I believe had fun. Here I am blogging at 2:30 a.m. because I can't sleep, I just wish I could sleep right now over anything else. Anyways, it was so relaxing up there, my favorite part had to be sleeping in the tent at night and hearing the wind blowing through the trees and the sound of the Gros Ventre river rushing nearby. Maybe I can't sleep because all I am hearing now is the sound of the fan blowing instead of those other sounds. I really enjoyed visiting with all of my family and hearing good stories from my Grandpa Clark. I get to see my brothers and sisters quite often, but I really felt like I got back in touch with them more being around them for 4 days. There was time to sit down with each of them and ask them how they are doing and what is new in their life. Sometimes it isn't really easy to learn those things just visiting on Sunday evenings with all of the neices and nephews running about.

I think I got heat stroke on the hike to Moose Ponds by Jenny Lake. That was the only downer of the vacation for me. The hike was supossed to be about 2.6 miles, but I think it ended up being more than that. It was a really sunny hot day and we stared hiking around 11 am. For Chase and myself we had filled a 32 ounce bottle with water and another 16 ounce bottle with water. I drink a lot of water while I hike or do any other physical activity and so needless to say by the time we had reached the moose ponds or a little after that, our water was down to about 4 ounces. Chase probably only drank about 8 ounces himself and I had guzzled the rest. On the way back, we took a different trail thinking it would get us closer to the car quicker ( I am not so sure about that now) and easier. For most of the hike it was surrounded by trees so there was much shade and was cooler. This other trail coming back was not in the trees at all and basically it was a field full of sagebrush and no cover. About half-way through this hellish field of brush I began to feel dizzy and faint. I stopped sweating and felt really cold. I told Chase that I was dizzy and he either didn't hear me, or thought I was just a wimp and complaining. So I just keep trudging on and things got even worse. By the time we were almost there I told Chase again and my sweet sister Denise noticed I was lagging behind and came to see what was the matter. She took one look at me and said that I should probably stop and they could come and pick me up in the car. I never had felt the way I did then. I wanted to die---I was so exhausted and thirsty and cold eventhough it was 80 degrees out. Chase and I sat and waited for my family to pick me up. Everyone was really concerned about me. While we waited, my brother-in-law happened to have some Snapple Juice and he gave it to me and told me to drink it all. I think this really saved me because I was not only dehydrated, but my blood sugar level was really low. I get really sick if I don't eat for a long period of time and I think it is because my blood sugar level gets too low for me. Anyways, my brother-in-law Brigham is in school now to become a doctor and he certainly displayed his knowledge and concern for me by giving me the drink and telling me to sit in the shade. He was the hero for the day. Thank goodness he was around when this was happening.

As for other news in the family, on Friday while everyone was up in Jackson minus my brother Darren, and his wife Ericka who was pregnant, had their baby at 5:25 a.m. From what I hear everyone is alright and though I am yet to see this little bundle of joy, I hear he is quite cute. They are naming him Casen Stewart Cooper. He weighed 8 lbs. 12 oz. and was 21 inches long. He has black hair and blue eyes. We can't wait to see him. They brought him home from the hospital on Sunday and although we are dying to see him, wanted to give Ericka and Darren some time to settle down at their home before going to see the little baby. But I think we will go and see him after work tonight.

It is now 3 a.m. so I am going to try and get some sleep again. We'll see if I can actually sleep or not. Hopefully I can get some pictures posted of the vacation soon.

Countdown to Jackson Hole

2008-07-08T16:47:00.004-06:00

Okay so I think my last post may offend some people so I do apologize for that. Sometimes I rant and carry on and then when I go back and read it, I feel like I am being racist or something. That is not my intention at all. Since I didn't want that post to be at the top of my blog, I decided I better write a new one. So the countdown is now 7 days 22 hours and 39 minutes. Oh I am counting! While the 4th of July weekend was lovely and I got that day off, it wasn't really a vacation. I seemed to be cooking a bunch on Saturday for the Cruise-in parade party at CarQuest (Chase's work). We had a really good time on Saturday at CarQuest. Both of us had never been to the Cruise-in parade so we were really excited. The party was fun and we had some really good food and a prime spot in the shade for watching the parade. However, I think I'd rather just view the cars at the fairgrounds where I can more closely see each car and have wonderful food and snacks at the fairgrounds.

By the 3rd time around of all of the cars parading, I was more than ready to go home. The drive home took like 35 minutes when it should have taken like 15. The traffic was so awful. Those of you who know me, know the equation of me (traffic + tons of people+ road rage + my temper = not so good)! I wish I was more patient. That is one thing I feel I need to work on. On Friday Chase and I went to the Cruise-in with Dad and Mom Cooper which was really fun, but really hot! We got there around 1 pm and left at 4 pm. It was so hot. Chase didn't feel to well that day, but was a good sport and came along anyways. I am so grateful for a patient, wonderful husband! He puts up with so much with me and the different escapades I decide to go on. Do you remember that Janet Jackson song called Escapade? Geez that was a while ago, early nineties perhaps? I remember my sister having a tape of it and Gabby and I listening to it on the boombox in the backyard and dancing to it.

Oh to be a little kid again. No responsibilities, fun summers, playing all the time. Oh I miss it, but at the same time I don't. I guess I like the no responsibilities and fun no school/work summers. I guess that is why I am looking forward to Jackson Hole camping trip this year. I really think I could live up there year-round. I love the atmosphere there, it seems so much more laid back and I love the scenery and all that you can do there. The hiking, skiing, swimming, white-water rafting, SHOPPING, and the fabulous Yippi-O-Candy Co. store!

Tourism has greatly increased since I can first remember going there. It used to be a little known secret gem. It is close to Yellowstone park which is also a plus. That is really a sad thing of how many tourists there are there, I often wonder how many more years our family will keep going up there because of this. Although we camp about a half hour north of the city, even the camp ground is growing with numbers by leaps and bounds!

No Habla Espanol! Se habla English only.

2008-07-02T22:36:00.003-06:00

It seems like everyone is going on vacation this weekend. I guess one great thing is that I don't have to work on the 4th but still get paid for it. :) Well the countdown until our vacation is 14 days. It is time for the yearly Cooper family Jackson Hole camping trip. We have been going every year since I can remember. We stay about 30 minutes north of Jackson Hole in Gros Ventre camp ground. I am so looking forward to it. I had to get a crown put on at the dentist today and my tooth is now killing me! I hope it gets feeling better.

On Sunday we went out to my parents' house and celebrated Justin's (my oldest nephew) 11th birthday. I can't believe that 11 years ago, he was born. He is getting so grown up. He is going into 6th grade this fall. It makes me worried to think that he will be exposed to some not great things that teenagers face. I've known people around my age that began smoking marijuana (not myself, of course) or experimenting with other drugs or alcohol at the age of 12! Every night we pray that our neices and nephews stay as innocent for as long as possible in this crazy messed up world. I can only hope and pray that he chooses good friends. I know being raised by great parents helps (which he has) but even they cannot make their children make the correct choices. I really think it comes down to friends and peer pressure. If you hang out with people that have the same standards as you, then more than likely it will be easier to be able to say no because it won't be around you in the first place.

I've seen drugs mess up people so much in their lives. People my age were in trouble with the law all of the time. One kid I went to school with got arrested for dealing meth and other drugs after we graduated and was sentenced to six years in prison. Just think how that will affect him for the rest of his life. When he does get out, it would be really hard to change and not go back to the same problems he had before. Plus it is really hard to get a job after they get out of prison.

I had one of the toughest calls today at work. Some people get angry and yell and that is really hard, but today I received a call from a lady that could hardly speak any english. Her last name was spanish but her accent seemed asian. Needless to say, a five minute call turned out to be 30 minutes. She couldn't understand me and I sure couldn't understand her. I kept trying to get an account number from her which is on the bill they have and that is the easiest way to look up a customer. She didn't seem to understand that she just told me the account holder's name (her husband?) and the address she lives at. I couldn't even understand what city she lived in. She kept saying, "Ok lady. Jose So-and-so no more. no more. Name is Miriam. My account Miriam." I don't know if Jose died, or moved out of the apartment or what. She wanted to put the account into her name instead of Jose's. I have to receive permission from her leasing office at the property she lives at before I can change it so I placed her on hold and contacted the leasing office. They did say her name was on the lease and so I could change it. When I got back on the phone with Miriam she said again, "Ok lady. Jose no more. Account number ie 101111111." I can't remember the actual account number and for secure purposes, did not list the actual account. So by that time I had already pulled up her account and told her I could change it. The call was eventually finished. But I was so frustrated from it because it just took so much time for something that would really have taken 5 minutes.

I cannot judge because I have never been in these people's shoes that speak another language as their primary and do not know english very well at all. I just feel that America is very accomadating to people here more so than any other country because they have almost everything available in Spanish which is the next biggest language spoken here next to English. Maybe that is why America is so great. I guess I just feel that if I was to move and live in France say for the rest of my life, I would make the hardest effort to learn the language and speak it there. I just think people come here illegally and expect everyone to accomadate them to make us speak their native tongue and neglect to learn the native language themselves. Now it is hard to obtain some jobs because they are now requiring you to be bilingual, to speak two languages. Many jobs I have wanted to apply for require this, I don't think that is fair. I live in the United States of America. The national language is English. I believe that employers should offer some incentive if a person does speak two languages, like a little bit higher pay, but to make it mandatory for a job, that is just sad.

I really think it is sad that these people's children have to make the calls to pay their parents' bills because they are the only ones that know English and not their parents. What kind of parenting is that? Seriously I have taken calls from children that sound like they are six or seven years old. Really, come on people. At work, we do have about 10 people that speak Spanish and so our customers can call in and speak to someone in spanish, but I just feel like this is hindering and not helping these people become adapted and inclined to learn English in the USA.

I know this country was founded by immigrants from different places in Europe and many languages were spoken here at first. So over two hundred years later, it has not still had many languages, just English. My forefathers adapted. They learned English. I know people legally immigrated through the 1920s (by large numbers) to America and it seems like even back 90 years, it was either sink or swim. These emigrants in the 1920s learned English. Now it is different. The people that come here legally seem to make the effort to adapt and learn English, I think they really do. It seems like those illegally here do not. That is just my two cents worth on that.

Summertime

2008-06-24T16:00:00.002-06:00

I can't believe that June is almost over! The weather has been so crazy this month. So our house has been up for sale 8 days now and it has been shown 6 of those 8 days, so I have to get my house clean and keep it clean while it is being shown. Chase and I really need to find an apartment soon. I just hate the thought of moving. It is hard work to move and so I guess I am procrastinating. Since we have Tinkerbell that makes it even harder to find a place that will accept pets and also I want the place to not be near a busy street and have a yard that she can go out and play in. She doesn't even use a litterbox anymore and goes to the bathroom outside so a yard with dirt would be lovely. My brother and sister-in-law are moving up to Pocatello after Ericka has her baby and I am really sad. I have been lucky to have all of my siblings living in Cache Valley and now I won't be as fortunate. It is good for them I am sure, but I am sad that I won't get to see them as much and Camden and the new baby. Chase is working hard for his dad and comes home late and exhausted. I feel bad that he works so hard for me and since I haven't been working much, I feel extremely guilty. I went to work today for a half day and it was good. It is just hard for me to not get anxiety about going back to work full time. The truth is that I don't want to work full time, I have liked being home as a housewife. I am hoping that I can go back to USU or BATC in the fall and hurry and get my degree done and then I can put Chase through school. He seems determined to do his dream and I can't seem to change his mind. He wants to become a herpetologist and own snakes and milk them for venom to sell anti-venom. I am terrified of snakes. So I am not sure how well this will work out. Maybe he will have to own a lab somewhere that has the snakes there and so we won't have any at our home. This last weekend we went camping up on my Grandpa Clarks land in Clarkston. We set up our tent and had tinfoil dinners and just had a great time just the two of us. We love camping and being outdoors. Chase also brought a few guns and we shot them. I shot his dad's 9 mm pistol and his brothers .44 cal revolver. They were pretty fun to shoot. Chase keeps wanting me to take hunter's ed so I can go and hunt with him. I want to do this but it is just finding the time. I guess we will see.

Father's Day

2008-06-13T20:24:00.002-06:00

Since Father's Day is coming up this weekend, I just wanted to post something about the fathers in our life-

I have the most wonderful Dad ever! He is always so willing to help Chase and I out when we need it, no questions asked. He is an example to us by serving others. He is a counselor in the Logan 60th singles ward and he is so good with the young single people there. I am proud of his accomplishments he has made in his life. He is so diligent in exercising. He has many medals and awards from running and cycling over the past 20 years or so. How many children can say that their dad did the Ironman in Hawaii? Or have ran like 15 marathons? And this is all after he was over 35. So many times when I have had a problem or was down, he offered to give me a blessing and every time I said yes, it always made things better. He is such a good man and worthy priesthood holder. To watch my mom and him together now all of the kids are out of the house, it is so cute! He is so sweet to my mother and takes care of her. I just can't say enough about my father, Dan Cooper. I love you daddy, Happy Father's Day!

Next, my other Father in my life is my father-in-law Ken Volkman. This man is such a great example to Chase and I. He always is concerned for the both of us and tries to do all that he can to help us out. This man is the hardest worker I have ever met. He works so much and so hard to provide for his family, he doesn't stop if he doesn't feel well or anything. We thank him for all that he has done for us there, by letting us work for him to earn some extra money. He is the best example of service in our lives. He will go out and help different people in the ward, just because. He will drop everything to help another. I am just so proud of him in all of his actions. He served in the military for many years and was a green beret. He served our country and we thank him for that. He is an outdoors man. He loves to hunt and has hunted bison, elk, moose, deer and wild turkey and many more I don't know about probably. I always feel spoiled and special at Chase's parents house because I am the only girl and I like it that way. But I will have to share once Zach and Trevor get married. We love you so much dad and Happy Father's Day!

Also wanted to mention our Grandfathers as well. Chase's Grandpa Denton is so much fun to be around. He can always make a funny joke to lift our spirits up. He works as a sealer in the temple and we think that is so neat that he is doing great service in the temple for others. He loves the Jazz and to hunt and spend time with his family. He is from Arkansas so he says a few words funny. He always tells us great stories of growing up on the farm in Arkansas and he also is a WWII veteran.

My Grandpa Clark is so special because he just radiates the spirit. He has had an amazing life and has definitely put in his fair share of service. About 20 years ago, he started the Martin Harris pageant and served as president for almost all of the years. He helps set up the stage every year to this day and pulls the set behind his tractor. He is so spiritual and always has a good story to tell. He loves to hunt deer and pheasants with his sons and grandsons. I have heard him share many stories from the railroad when he worked as an engineer. He is always more than willing to help his family in every obstacle they may face. We love him so much and hope that he lives to be 100! Happy Father's Day.

Grandpa Volkman lives in Nebraska and I have only met him a few times, but from what I know he has raised a good son. He is funny with the different comments he makes. His health isn't the greatest and gets around with a walker. His laugh is infectious and lights up the room. Chase said that he learned so much about working when he would go out to the farm to visit his grandparents growing up. He said that grandpa was always working on the farm and taught him a few things. We hope he is doing well and miss him so much. Happy Father's Day.

I just hope that we can all thank our fathers in our lives for all that they do for us. They sacrifice so much to make us happy and see that we are alright. Happy Father's Day!

Work vs. Hard Work

2008-06-11T17:34:00.000-06:00

Since I've been on a work siesta for the past week and a half to get my medicines working right, my lovely wonderful husband and his father decided that I could dedicate my time to earning some money in the 'family business.' I had just gotten done at the doctor's office and picked up some perscriptions for Chase and I, and I decided to phone my hubby and see if he needed the meds I picked up for him. He said that he did and so I got the location of where he and his father were working and drove on up. (Sidenote: the area they were working in is so beautiful, It is called Green Canyon Estates it is just at the mouth of Green Canyon in North Logan. I think the Address is something like 1900 N and 2600 East.)

(Subscript again: I had dated a boy in high school that took me on a couple of dates up Green Canyon. It was so much fun we had a big group of people and went up and hiked around and had a cookout, I thought that was a really fun time in my life. These boys in high school were really good boys that were so creative and knew how to have good clean fun. I miss not being able to go and do fun things like that again. I think your attitude and decisions can really change depending on what kind of people you hang around with. Thinking on that note personally, I just remember always feeling happy and joyful around these people. I felt closer to God and Christ. I felt such a strong testimony in my life when I hung around these people and this boy in particular.

I wish I could be more like this now in my life. I know I decide my actions and my behaviors and I am responsible for how close I am spiritually to God, etc. I just must be a pessimist in real life. If anyone has any suggestions on how to always have a good positive attitude and spirituality, please let me know, I could use this.

Back to my original story:

I drove up to the site and apparently my husband and his father thought I should work with them for the rest of my day to earn some money. Oh and the family business is KGV Landscaping for those who don't know. So I had my nice, newer crocs on and no socks with these fleece sweat pants and a t-shirt on. So, needless to say, I didn't feel 100% dressed for the job. I would have liked my older running shoes on with long socks and some older levi's and a jog bra and a older t-shirt, but it would have taken like 30 minutes to drive home to Smithfield and back again with the lovely construction going on in Smithfield. Oh, and those who think Landscaping is a piece of cake job, come try it. I dare you. It is not the "oh, I am mowing the lawn on a riding lawn mower type-job" or "just planting a bunch of plants" job either. One thing that I truly admire about my in-laws and husband is that they really know how to work hard and I respect them for it. My father-in-law in particular. He works 16 hour days like 6 days a week and he is over 50, so he always can outwork us, even his sons, who probably wouldn't agree with me on this. I just really think of him as the best example of work-ethic and hard work and service for others. I love him so much for taking care of us and providing for his family.

So I set to work at this newly built house by Dr. and the Mrs. Garg, although it isn't the pain doctor Garg in the Specialty Hospital or the pediatrician female Doctor Garg, so I am guessing the Gastroenterologist, although I have never met or been to this Dr. Garg as I have seen the others. This job was a big one, I am guessing that it was around a $50,000 just for landscaping the whole property. The backyard slopes up really steeply so what we did is put a bunch of large rocks in and created like two levels and planted trees and bushes and then laid down mulch/bark to cover it all. What Chase and I worked on was putting in a drip system for all of these plants on the two levels that were steep so that the Garg's wouldn't have to water their plants individually, it would just come on automatically like a sprinkler system would. I had no gloves and was put to work putting holes in the big pipe with an attachment and attaching a piece to a small flexible pipe and then attaching an end piece which determines how much water will be going to each plant either 1 gallon per hour, 2-gallon, 5-gallon etc. The larger the gallon is for the bigger plants like trees would need more water, right? (My teachers always thought I was really great at writing and I quite enjoyed it, but sometimes they thought I rambled on and gave too much information. Remember those kids in high school who always complained about writing a 3, 5 or 10 page paper, like "how am I going to write enough to get all of the pages complete?" type thing, well, I was just the opposite. I would always write too much, or have too much information and would go well over the alloted amount, so I had to find a way to cut out parts in each of the papers I wrote. I believe my sister Denise is the same way and could agree with me at this point. See? I got off-track again!)

Well, this job was not very fun and not exactly labor intensive but was more hands-on finger intensive which was not fun. My first two fingers, were all calloused and numb and my wrists up to my shoulders hurt so bad by days end. So I was kneeling, sitting, etc going along in this mulch which reacted with my fleece pants like velcro and so each tree or shrub I would come to, I would have to kneel down/sit on my bum and attach the stupid pipe and then stand, brush my pants off from the bark, and walk a couple of steps to the next one. Oh, if I only had Levi's. And socks. Needless to say, I ended up getting bark down my pants, in my underwear and in my shoes. Those of you who know me, know I do not like my feet getting dirty. A picture of me as a two year old in San Diego can attest to that. Mom and Dad had me on the beach and mom was carrying me along the sand and thought I would like to get down and walk along it as well in my bare feet. She put me down with my shoes off and put my little feet in the sand. I immediately didn't like it and began to cry. To this day, I don't really like sand on my feet, it really bothers me because you can never quite get it all off when you put your shoes back on from the beach or lake until you get home to shower. I HATE sand! I love California and the beaches, but not the sand. So the same goes with this lovely bark in my shoes, I HATED IT in my shoes every step I took all of the way. I really enjoyed working with Chase and he kept tellling me how much he loved me working together with him (maybe we'll take over the family business Dad!).

At the end of the day, I really got a wake up call on how hard of a job landscaping is. Now there is work (which I do at Conservice, thank heavens for that glorious job) and there is hard work (like landscaping). I really enjoyed being outdoors all day (that is one perk I don't have) and hearing sounds of nature all around, but I just honestly felt like I was going to die by 5:30 or so. I started around 10. Oh and one thing I forgot, SUNSCREEN. Apparently the Volkman boys have some strange immunity to the sun, they don't really burn easily and they just tend to go really dark brown. One thing I pray for my children is that they get the Volkman dark skin and be lucky with that. I know Great-Grandma Thompson would be saying how beautiful ivory skin (pasty-white) is and how much we should value it. Denise and I share this common white skin. We burn, burn some more and then go back to being bright white again. No summer tan for me, especially for my legs.

So while I enjoyed working with my husband and being outdoors, my mouth was soured because I burned my neck, ears, face, and arms. And I was wearing long short sleeves, so now I really have the farmers tan going on now. Three days later: I am still suffering from this awful sunburn. Words of advice: wear sunscreen. Although, from this experience, I did learn the value of hard work and how much my Father-in-law and Chase's work really is. From time to time, I would help on a big project like planting flowers, shoveling dirt around, or laying sod (I am not sure if that was harder or what I did on this job).

I think the generations today really don't understand what hard work is. Our grandparents and forefathers didn't have it so easy as we do. They really did work hard to earn a living and make a home. Anyways, so here is my long post--I didn't know how fun blogging really is.